A Moment of Vulnerability

I don’t think about things like identity much. I try not to, at least. It’s one of the things I’ll never get right, and it feels much less overwhelming when I don’t take much notice of it.

Is my identity looking so much like my mom that people think we’re the same person

Is my identity my nationality

Or my height

Or what my Math teacher thinks of me

Or whether I have the capacity to maintain an Instagram feed?

My identities are so different for every person who knows me.

To some I’m an artist, to some I’m a nerd. I’m evil, I’m kind, I’m a girl, I’m a tomboy.

I’m supposed to be good at Sanskrit because it’s in my blood.

I’m supposed to study engineering because everyone else does.

I’m supposed to be outgoing because connections can’t happen gradually, or studious because that’s the only way I’m going to get anywhere in life.

Let’s face it. I don’t know which of these things I am.

It scares me to think that people have so many opinions on me and I don’t even know them. It scares me that my friends have changed and I have changed and the world around me is changing so fast.

I’m in a phase where I’m questioning almost everything around me. Some questions are stupid, and not knowing some answers kills me.

What does it mean to be Indian? What caused the Coronavirus? How do computers really work? Do I believe in God?

When people around me are gossiping about the latest Chicken Girls episode or talking about someone they hate I feel myself thinking that this isn’t where I want to be.

I want to meet people I’ll end up really caring about. I want a place that I can call home. And I want to be someone I’ll be proud to call me.

Maybe at some point it won’t matter that I forgot to watch a show someone asked me to or that I forgot Holi is coming.

I can’t be everything that every person wants me to be.

And as of now, that’s the only thing I’ve understood about my identity. The uncertainty of it.

Sparkler Photoshoot 🌟 (and a Long Overdue Announcement)

Hellloooo peeps! I’m feeling good today, even though I twisted my arm really bad and I’m currently sitting with a polka-dot hot water pack on my shoulder.

For those of you who didn’t know, Diwali was a couple days back! Diwali is the Indian festival of lights, and also an excuse for fireworks and eating sweet things. 🤤

We didn’t do much of the fireworks part this year, but I did manage to get some really good closeups of some sparklers!

Continue reading Sparkler Photoshoot 🌟 (and a Long Overdue Announcement)

Some Sort of Update (feat. Music, Photography, Art, Food et cetera)

Wow. I don’t even remember the last time I wrote a post. It’s been MONTHS. I’ve been in a looong blogging slump. Also, a life slump.
I don’t know about you, but for me, motivation is a strange thing. It just randomly chooses to pop up, and randomly fades out.

Hello there! It’s me, trying to climb out of my slump.

I have mixed feelings about not having been here for a such long time. If anything, taking a break has eased the responsibility of maintaining a blog while keeping my life on track, which has become quite a challenge, to be honest. But I miss this place and this community SO much.

I just want to put everything I’ve done in these past few months in words. It’s going to abrupt and bumpy, probably, but I’m trying my best. XD Here goes nothing, people…


Continue reading Some Sort of Update (feat. Music, Photography, Art, Food et cetera)

Candle Shops and Streetside Whatnots// Photoshoot

So here’s the thing- I despise shopping, books and paint being exceptions. Don’t judge, it’s true. However, I don’t despise photography, and when you’re out touring India (which is my country but is so huge that you can’t really tour it enough), it’s not uncommon to come across photo-worthy, bizarre and beautiful things.

These pictures are pretty old, to be honest, but I recently found them and thought they were worth a post. Most of them are from a candle shop we came across at one point in time, and some are random streetside pictures.

Hope you like them! 😀

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Thanks for sticking around. I’d love to know what you think!
If you’d like to see pictures with an Indian bazaar spotlight that I did a while back, click here.

Until next time! ❤